Friendship

Assalamualaikum! my mind is in a total mess right now. i try to figure everything out and still all over the place. i have a lot of unanswered questions. why my best friend treated me like i'm not important??? all memories that we had together, all the secrets that we shared with each other doesn't mean anything to you??? at all??? i know you are scared of attachment, commitment but i'm not your girl friend! i'm your friend! after you think you found a girl that you like, you totally ignored me like we never know each other. how sad is that? i thought you are different from others but yeah that's my fault for putting high expectations on people. you know what? i'm not going to ignore you like you did to me, because for me my family my friends is my treasure. i value each and everyone of you regardless the treatment i get from you. i didn't come and go from people's life easily like you did. i don't know or even understand your concept of friendship but i know mine. i will uphold it until i die. i hope you found your eternal happiness and appreciate it. don't be an idiot! yours truly.

what matters

Assalamualaikum.. wow this time i have no problem in determining the title. kudos to me! I'm not good at expressing myself these days. i just love how i feel right now. being secretive and all.. i realized that if you friends wants to be part of your life, they will put an effort to it. but it seems like only some of them shows it. yeah.. i really having a hard time at first to accept all of this but after days, weeks, month of thinking, observing i fully understand these people and myself. quality have higher value than quantity. at the end of the day, those who really truly loves and care for you will be there for you in the end. Appreciate and value them.

i miss my guy friends a lot! my buddy! seriously i am! i just wanna tell that to their face so that i can see for myself their awkwardness and shyness hahahaha i miss u guys so much i truly am. thank you for all the good times we had together. i'm sorry for not being a friend like you wanted to. and sorry for not fully understand u guys. don't forget me ayy.

my focus now is to improve myself, to impress ALLAH, to focus on studies and spend more time with my family and girlfriends. nevertheless, I love you all so much. Assalamualaikum

The current me

Assalamualaikum to all! well.. where should I begin? I try to avoid people lately.. I don't know why. becoming introvert maybe? or maybe I don't want or afraid to get hurt. I used to put high expectations on people before especially someone that I'm close to or someone that I love and I ended up with wound and scars inside my heart that I never share with anyone. They said to me never expect people to do the same like what I did to them..people have different kind of perspectives in their life. yes I know and I understand but like what they said, I should not be expecting because you know your duty, your roles as someone important in others people life. Based on my observation, people will appreciate and value your existence more when you less exist in their life, when you are not part of their life anymore to be exact. maybe that's what I tend to do. not because I want people to appreciate me but because I appreciate myself and I know my own self worth and I don't want to spend my time on some people who are only using me or looking for me when they are bored or their precious friends are busy with other things. Other than becoming introvert hahaha I'm learning on "how to survive when you live alone" I guess. because my best friends are so busy with other commitments. some are working, some are playing a good daughter, some busy with assignments and some are busy with their loves life. so here i'm busy typing my feelings and thoughts since no one is around to listen. hahaha I miss my family a lot. i guess that's that. Assalamualaikum :)

Apa eh???

Assalamualaikum to all my readers! i always have a hard time in determining the title for my post hahaha sometimes it does not relate with the content of the post lollll sooo i'm just going to update about my life. okay it's weekends now and on monday we have public holiday to celebrate Labor  Day! yeayyy how exciting! we're going to get 4 days of holidays!!! yeepee!!! but here I am stuck in UIA. haahaha I already went back home last week so this week i have decided to stay in UIA due to tons of works that needs my 100 percent attention! but who am I kidding??? i did not start anything yet..the mood is not there.. i feel a bit bored because my girls isn't around. They all went back to their hometown. whatever it is i still feel happy because i can have my me time.. doing all the laundry, cleaning the room and update my blog! yeahhh Alhamdulillah. I've been watching movies since last night.. from hindustan to tagalog and hollywood perhaps??? I can't wait to finish this sem and spend time with my family.. you know we all went separate ways for the time being. my parents and baby still in Cambodia, my eldest sis in UPM, my lil bro in UTHM and here I am in UIA. I miss them so much only Allah knows how I feel. no one can understand me right now. seriously. whatever it is, i really appreciate their effort to make me feel better and I'm so grateful to all my best friends that are always around when I need them the most. ALHAMDULILLAH. and yeah... no love story from me for the time being hahaha In shaa Allah that is no longer what I searching for. Do pray for me.. In shaa Allah, you all are in my prayer. lets pray for each other and for a better world. Assalamualaikum..Ida <3

Fresh Start :)

Assalamualaikum!!!! wowwww dah lama tak update blog and bila dah bukak ni I decided to delete all of my previous post hahaha because I don't want my friends to read what I wrote when I was young and immature. so malu!!! >< hahaha so my life isn't that interesting.. oh, I'm a 3rd year and 1st semester student now, to begin with. Everything is doing well for now, In shaa Allah. Maybe because this semester the subject is not very technical.. still juggling with numbers but not that much and still playing with lots and lots of graph.. hahaha I'm a economics student, what do you expect butttt still not very good in analyzing graph.. sigh! and still struggling in time management since i love to sleep and you know what? I blame social media too for being such a bad influence and distraction. yeah..I miss my parents actually. so much! speaking of them, they are still in Cambodia. My father just went back to Phnom Penh on Tuesday this week. He supposed to go to LIMA in Langkawi but he decided to spent time with us. How sweet! I love him. However, my mum and baby didn't join ayah because my adik have to attend school since it's not school holidays in Phnom Penh. I wanna share our picture with ayah but it's very dangerous to share it here since everyone can view it if they found this page. so better not! I'm on my midsem break and as far as I'm concern it supposed to be like a real break right?? without any stress about the datelines and midterm right?? seems like midbreak is just another study week that we don't get before our final exam. hahaha but whatever it is, i love study is just that i really need to struggle and spend more time with books! which I'm not for now...okay Please pleaseeee do pray for me. thank you a lot. only Allah can repay your kindness. one more thing! wherever you go, put a smile on your face because it might helps to cheer up someone who have a really bad day. ok! Assalamualaikum :)